When I was pregnant for the second time, I almost assumed that I would be having another boy and he would be just like my first-born. Obviously I was wrong on both accounts. From the first day of my daughter’s life she showed signs of own little personality & fell in love with her immediately. So here are 6 things I have learnt over the past 6 months from being a Mum of two.
Nature vs Nurture?
From the moment my two children were born they started to show their own specific personality traits. Their own little mannerisms & temperament were built in and have stuck with them. I can hopefully nurture them into being pretty amazing littles humans but they are also wired in their own quirks which makes them special. My son is very curious, absorbs everything before giving anything back, very smart, loyal, sensitive, loves his Mummy & would happily climb back into my tummy if he had the chance. My daughter is independent, a total nosey parker, wants to be involved in everything, too busy to feed, cheerful & adores her big brother.
I used to be the person who liked to arrive 1 hour early, rather than be 5 mins late. I still enjoy being on time, but have just come to accept that if I hurry the kids, it tends to slow down the whole process. So start getting ready earlier, but if you can’t, don’t panic, you are probably meeting up with other families in the same boat. Just to go to the beach took us an hour to pack the car and get kids in. When you think you are sorted, someone has a poo explosion or needs a feed. And don’t forget the bags and bags of extra towels, clothes, food, sun protection, toys, nappies, what else have I forgotten? I will forget something
Buy a Lotto ticket
On those days that both children are sleeping at the same time and you get some time to ‘reset’ go get yourself a lotto ticket because these lucky occasions are rare. I must admit, in the early weeks home with a new born they had several naps at the same time but that quickly stopped. So if everyone is sleeping, your must be full of good luck! Life is busy, noisy, different & wonderful. Oh, but I haven’t actually wont he lottery yet!
Brother led weaning
Anything goes with baby number 2. Mine wont breast feed very often during the day because she is so distracted by her amazing big brother, who she must be in eye contact with at all times. Sterilising anything just purely optional. Babies bounce pretty good when being body slammed by their big brother & they usually get a good giggle out of it anyway. A friend told me she recently found out her 2nd child doesn’t have a nut allergy because her eldest was in the cupboard having a jolly time smearing peanut butter all over himself and his sister.
The best thing about being a parent again is that it is so much easier to trust your own instincts when it comes to parenting. I questioned myself constantly, was thrown off my game if someone suggested something else and read a lot more than I did my whole life (that is saying a lot for people who really know me). But now I really know that my Mummy radar is on point. It’s easier to shut out the chatter of other Mums or family who have good intentions with advice, but they really don’t read your children the way you do. You got this!
Love Love Love
Before my daughter arrived it was hard to imagine how I could love another human the way I love my son. But honestly, I fell in love with her the second I smelt her. I love her immensely for the same & different reasons. My heart is so full and my heart now lives outside my body. I do feel guilty when I think about having more children, because then I have to share more love & time. But when we do I know my heart will grow in ways I can’t imagine just yet.
Do I wish I had known all this before having children? Not particularly. It is so fun discovering your children and learning things the hard way. Because sometimes the hard way is the only option. I used to get annoyed at people who would say ‘oh you will know understand one day when you have children’. I find this statement just annoying because you need to live in the moment & your children will be different from other kids & if you need help, just ask because sometimes its not obvious to everyone else.
Wishing you a crazy happy day with you family
Philippa Bowman, September 2015
Nurtured Fitness Owner
Pre & Post Natal Fitness Expert & Trained Babywearing Consultant